HERE'S WHAT YOU SAID, 43

Lloyd Duncan (Washington, D.C.) - Until we learn that beating kids teaches them to use the same tool for problems, we will never break this cycle. I've often wondered why beatings are good for kids but not adults. Adults have the fully developed minds but do wrong and escape corporal punishment. Kids are still in the learning phase. Violence begets violence.

 I hope that you find peace for yourself some where in this world.  There is a big reason why you survived … if only to tell your story.  Once again I am sorry for what you have had to go through at the deceptive, ignorant, and thoughtless hands of heartless people.  I know you said therapy doesn't help, but some times other things might help.  I hope you find some peace that makes living your life now, worthwhile.  I think this world needs people like you.  Thanks for this opportunity to write you.

Minister Kendal Richardson, Founder / Frontline Ministries (Irving, Texas) – I support the work you are doing against Child Abuse, Rape and Molestation.  I personally have been on both sides of the fence, but today will do my part in helping to educate, encourage and to enlighten Gods’ Children.

Maurice W. Pitt  (Silver Spring, Maryland)  - Hi C.J. - Awesome site. Child Abuse is despicable and isn't justified under any circumstances. Keep advocating on behalf of defenseless children. Thanks.

Anonymous - Child abuse and molestation is the most hideous crime one can commit.   Justice for the victim should have no limits, nor should the punishment to those who commit these horrible crimes.

Dr. Michael A. Cornelius  (Hazleton, Pennsylvania) - Ms. Brooks,  after reading your section “Black On Black”,  here is something that has annoyed me since my childhood - dealing with family members who that thought they should hit the children as a teaching module. I find that until someone takes on creating a campaign targeting comedians and writers promoting abuse to sell their story or joke, then there will be no breakthrough.

I say go straight at faceless attributors.  Just claim. "It's not funny. It's barbaric. Anyone promoting it is." Don't indict names. Just target the campaign as a directive for people to start to understand that if it's not funny, it's no longer acceptable. Believe me, the defective people will notice. It will not fix their lives but it will alert them that they are obsolete. Get comedians involved in leading the campaign.

After creating the campaign, it will encourage others to have to consider how they were raised no longer being accepted anymore as a legacy behavior to pass on. Maybe abusers will not all get help but they will realize they are knuckle-draggers. People hate to find out how absolutely wrong they are but they like if they can deal with it secretively at a pace.

Those who are abused will have courage as well to not own the shame in covering for their parents who abuse them. I think using the block of citizens who has bastardized abuse as comedic fodder should be the main people doing the heavy lifting. Instead of attacking them, ask them to spearhead the campaign or be left behind to stick out later noticeably in not correcting the backwards ways of thinking. Those who feel no guilt won't have a problem.

Honestly, our people are avoiding talking about it still because so many were victims and just brushed it aside or learned to block it out. I would not even turn to the clergy. Collectively, they are failures. They hate conflict and they want to stick up to the verse in Proverbs. Anyway, they don't lead any capacity building campaigns.

I just think comedians would be very effective since they were they exploited their own and others' ignorance about it. This would be a start in teaching sectors how to take on capacity building instead of taking up space and corrupting it. Ask the comedians if they want to lead or get left behind. (My cousin is a famous celebrity and he does nothing because he wants to; he does it because he doesn't want to be left behind; he's always on the heels of the innovators.)  This is a fantastic site.  Please keep up your work, my sister!

Cleophus Middleton, Jr. (Anne Arundel County, Maryland) - Thank you for this, C.J.  It is such a sad situation isn’t it? I believe people in this world are growing wickeder by the day.  This is a very violent thing going on now. Mothers abusing their own.  That truly floors me, because women are usually nurturers.  People see things out of order some report it, some don’t.  It seems the children of this world aren’t safe any more, some even in their own homes. And that is so very sad. They deserve a safe loving home life, and a happy child hood.

Mrs. Aileen M. Gregory (Lexington, Kentucky) - Ms. Brooks, you sure have run the gamut of abuse.  After reading your Autobiography, “I … And When”, I am truly sorry that you did not experienced love during your childhood. While I have been abused throughout my life, and am still having a difficult time with it, I can't imagine the pain you must feel daily.  However, for you to feel love for others is truly miraculous in light of the lack of love you were shown.

I personally wish there was something that I could have done to help you.  I can understand how you could still feel the way you do about life, because of the unfairness you have been treated with.  I am disgusted with the schools you attended, and had no idea that they could go that far in remaining silent for the sake of saving their jobs.  How they could they see evidence of the torture and torment, and send you to back home at the end of the day to people that were doing it is far beyond my understanding.

I understand how money cannot take the pain away.  I would rather have had my family and their love than to have money or anything else. There is no replacement for a mothers love.  It is unfortunate that illness resides in families and rules everything within.  It's sad that people cannot see how sick they are and so quick to point a finger outward without seeing inward.  That's the problem though, you know.  People don't care enough to look inward and see.

But also, how were they raised? Parents some times act only how they were shown.  I wonder how your parents were treated.  Were they shown the same lack of love, and just didn't know better?  Not making excuses here, but just wondering.  I know that my father was an alcoholic, and that his father was also.   It runs in families.  I am the scapegoat in my family-unless I stay away - and the blame has left me with nothing but pain. Especially when you did nothing to cause this.  But whom am I telling?  You know how it is to be blamed for things you are not guilty of.

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Evangelle O. Morrison - C.J., I just had to write to tell you what a strong and brave woman you are.  At such a young age, with everyone around you, no one you could trust. I am so sorry. I am going to put you in a special place in my prayers. Stay strong. 

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Abbiana Davis - I have read your book and cannot tell you how sad it makes me feel. I wish I could go back there and help you when you were young. What you had to go through was cruel. I hope you find peace in your life.  You deserve it so much. You are truly inspirational.

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Michelle Nicolette Greene - As I was reading your book I wanted nothing more than to take you as a youngster into my own home to show you love & how children should be treated. I am so sorry for all the unwanted, unloved & mistreated children everywhere. It all just seems unfair. I cannot imagine what goes on the minds of abusers – and for all that matters, I don't think I want to know. I would like to shake your hand.  You are a survivor and such a strong person, to have lived your life in the face of such cruelty. I will pray for you that you will feel peace. You will soon have supporters from all over the world. I hope it may help a small bit to know that all people are not as bad as the ones you have encountered in your life thus far.

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Lyman Hairston - You are an incredibly brave, strong person. Having written your book and having the good kind heart you have, you have done a lot to help others.

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Linwood Mitchell - Wow, what a sad and disturbing life you lived through. You said you wondered how your life could of turned out? I wondered the same thing while reading your story. An excellent talent in music. And, to say the least an amazing writer.

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Jalaiya Ragland - I read your book and it was brilliant. It was very emotional and honestly all I can say is I wish I could just hug you and tell you that you are a wonderful and strong person, and you deserve all the happiness in the world. Your past has made you a strong person and I pray for you to find happiness and peace everyday. Your book was fantastic and it has reminded me that in every bad situation, there is something beautiful, and that beauty is you.

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Kelara Morning - When we stand together we are so much stronger, C.J.  Best wishes to you.  I have found another hero speaking out and breaking the silence in the fight against child abuse.

Amaria K. Carter (Orlando, Florida) - Wishing you the entire best and looking forward to sharing and surviving with you!